About a month or so ago, I decided to start a blog. I have yet to write in it. It feels like a jump into the void and I question whether I can walk the path of what a blog would demand, whatever that may be. It’s a void to me. At this moment in time, I recognize I need to be vulnerable while at the same time be in the moment, grounded in who I am. Fully present with myself. Throughout my life, friends have used words to describe me as earthy, grounded, rooted. Yet, I have had periods of stress and upheaval, shock and trauma, grief and loss, like most people. I didn’t feel grounded during many of these situations. (The worst of which almost “did me in.”) At some point along these journeys, an inner voice would guide me to seeing the worst in a different light. I had to first get intimate with the “stress”. I had to go into a relationship with it and the emotions she provoked. With illness, I had to see it as an ally to teach me, I had to partner with it. Then we were on the same side. With loss, I have found “being with it in silence while recalling the oneness of what was” teaches me, expands my heart and helps me not to drown in sorrow. Looking back at different jobs I have had, my most “rooted energy, came from those experiences that brought me into deeper relationship with people and the earth. My most stressed, ungrounded experiences were those that demanded a lot from me with little relationship. That would send me right to my head and cut off my heart. The one thing that would help me in these times, has always been nature. The more I would go to her, the more peace and balance I would gain. She would become my partner without my full consciousness of what she was actually doing for me.
I am dedicating my time to learn more and to share more of my experience of the oneness of nature. Mother Earth is beyond words in what she brings to us all and I may fumble as I strive for words to explain my relationship with her. I often feel like a child just learning about the world, because, her depth, her mystery, her compassion is endless. I seek to go below the surface of what I see, what I walk upon, what I take from Mother Earth. I feel a deep love and respect for her, but in my heart, I have an ache. I have a feeling of amnesia. Something in me knows and remembers her magnificence, but dogma, indoctrination and the illusion of separation has left deep some scars that limit my experience of wholeness. I want to heal this forgetfulness. I want to dissolve the scars and breathe her in deeply.
As I have made this commitment, I know she is helping me. All I need is within her. She offers me peace, she gives me her medicine, her support, her guidance. She talks to me in silent nudges, a warm breeze, a strong wind, a foggy day, a violent storm, a perfectly still day. I hear her with my intuition, within a flash of awareness, within a dream or vision. Sometimes she sends a winged one or a four legged to send me a message or an affirmation. Nature is wholeness, nature can heal in so many blessed ways. I just need to ground myself to wholly receive these blessings. “Grounding Tree” will be my testimony of my journey.
My name is Trescia. It is pronounced, “Tree see ya,” but this is an unusual name to pronounce for most people and along the way, it was shortened to “Tree.” I did not choose this nickname, it came to me and I have loved having a name that reminds me of some of my favorite beings in nature.
Throughout my life, I have always felt at home outside. When I was a child, if I was upset or scarred, I would run a block or so away to a tree, climb it and tell my problems to that tree. I didn’t consciously think the tree was listening and would answer me, but something in me felt safe and nurtured by that tree.
When I look back on it now, I recall that tree was next to a swamp and many people would back their car up to that swamp and dump their old tires, and household items that they didn’t know what to do with. The swamp was surrounded by trees. As an adult, I believe those trees comforted the swamp and all organisms living within it. Those that dumped on it, must have been in a deep state of forgetfulness to have done that to her.